Hmm…

Frankly, I can’t say I enjoyed reading this piece. The general attitude that comes forth is negative, and touched with a bit of paranoia. I spent a good bit of my time trying to determine whether the girl is trying to make up her mind if she should break and run for her life or not. Ultimately, I reached the conclusion that she had made up her mind the moment she met him that he’s not to be trusted.

This story evokes the notion of “stranger danger”. If that was the author’s intent, then I guess as a plot concept, it’s a success. But if the author was simply having difficulty deciding what she wanted to say about the encounter, then it lacks sufficient commitment to a concept.

Ultimately, I came away with the impression that this story lacks sufficient plot development and focus. It needs to make a point, but the only point that I perceived was that the girl in the story was afraid of the man she was dating, and needed to distance herself from him as fast as she possibly can. That is not the kind of story I would choose to immerse myself in, if I had been given a choice (perhaps in a preview of the plot — such as reading the cover flap in a published book).

Member of the Medium Forum, varied interests, particularly preservation of American social equality and environmental preservation.

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